This year has been so much different from any other year, plentiful with global events and polarised highs and lows. It is with mixed emotions I reflect upon 2020 which for sure is up until now, the most significant one in my lifetime.
Reflections
The year of 2020
From the start we got thrown right into turbulent catastrophes ranging from climate disasters to social disruptions on a global scale. It was almost as if we could sense something about to happen. Before any outbreak in Europe, we already had two losses in our Family. The darkness was spreading over the globe like a thick smog, chocking us with angst.
We all saw what was happening in China with the virus, but were merely joking about such a thing happening to us. When Italy went into lockdown, the heightened sense of anxiety could be felt amongst friends and colleagues. By the time it finally reached our homes, people here in London were preparing from armageddon and buying up all soaps and toilet rolls. I too bought 40 kilos of rice to make sure I could feed the family. Lucky for us, it didn’t turn out the way we feared. It turned out much better.
Having the privilege of working from home and being able to spend more time with my child has been the single biggest upside as a result of the lockdown. This year I have probably spent more time with my daughter than any of my forefathers have with their children. Previous generations didn’t have the technology we have to log in from your breakfast table and zoom your way through the year. It is surely something we take for granted. Waking up and having those moments with your loved ones every morning is another thing we gloss over and forget the importance of when we’re in the rat race. Even though my other half lost her job as a result of the pandemic and made it financially more tricky for us, I still am grateful for what’s happened. I feel that the last nine months have brought us closer together as a family and that we’re bonding on even deeper levels. It made me disregard all the things I do not have and made me appreciate even more how much I do have in life. It made me realise that I am rich in the truest sense of the word, even though my accounts don’t have countless zeros behind the figures. The people around us are our most valuable treasure. Real, meaningful relationships brings us happiness.
For once, I had time to reflect, set goals and work on personal projects which I’d been putting off. This unlocked freedom of extra hours in the day which I’d usually spend standing upright on a crammed tube was given back to me. I’m pleased to say that I managed to use it productively and not squander it. In the first few months of lockdown, I wrote a book. Not long after, I began designing products and selling them online.
I was never a keen runner, but when the sun came out in the summer I formed a new habit of morning runs. Looking back, I’ve never read as many books and created so much new art ever in my life. In all honesty I felt like I was living like ‘I was supposed to’.
Even though this period has allowed me to work heavily on myself and my own ambitions, I still remain sceptical of how this situation is being handled. There has been many theories thrown around on how it came about and what needs to be done to bring things back to normality, but in most cases they are extreme to one end or the other. Truth is that things will never go back to how they used to be. We are all part of a cosmic evolution which sometimes takes a downturn to correct itself. Whilst I am upmost sympathetic to any victims to the pandemic (our granduncle passed away from Covid), I do feel like the stats are being blown out of proportion. The way the media presents the figures appear to be deliberately boosted to make a bad situation seem even worse. The virus is real, and the people who die are real - but the figures are viewed from a skewed perspective. The number of people who tested positive for the virus 2 weeks prior to their death are all being pulled into the growing number of deaths. Does that mean someone who caught the virus and recovered, only to be hit by a bus the following week is also part of that stat? Never have we seen coverage like this, and it does not seem to help people cope better. If anything it is spreading fear into the minds and hearts of people.
What we need is healing. Not only physical but more importantly mental healing. With everything that is going on, there is no better time to look inwards and learn how to become at peace. I really hope more people will take up meditation and breathing exercises to calm their spirits and connect with their higher minds. Stepping down from the hamster wheel of life where one sees colleagues more than their own children is nothing but good. However many find it claustrophobic and hard to cope being trapped in their own house. For this very reason, internal reflection is a wonderful practice which costs nothing and can be accessed by anyone from anywhere.
I think what’s happening is a natural stage in evolution when a virus comes in to ameliorate it’s host. How we’ve reacted can often come across as a human experiment on how much the governments can control the masses. We are the first generation to be fully aware of the damage we are causing and we have to face the mirror to reflect on how we are living. Can we eat better? Can be recycle more? Can we change our lives in such a way that we can be more happy and do less damage? Our duty now is to figure out how we can become better. Both on an individual and a global human level.
It is well known amongst Kabbalists that in order to build something new, you have to tear down the old. A shift has begun, and it will carry on for some time. It is part of the new age of Aquarius? Perhaps?
Reflection drawing of 2020.